Tech Day Insanity....

Today we had our first tech rehearsal for the new production of "Cinderella" which was challenging to say the least. My body is still having such a hard time adjusting to the idea of rehearsing all day and then performing at night and even though it wasn't my cast doing the run, I felt their pain. Spacing a ballet as complicated as this could warrant an entire day purely just walking through; but that's not how we professionals do it! We run it all right out of the gate. There are still sections that some people don't feel comfortable with and adding the sets and costumes to that complicates things. I decided I would play "Mystery Science Theater" with Grant in the audience so we had a great time doing running commentary on the entire day. Along the way I took a few pictures, some of which ended up being okay. Above is one of the first act kitchen scene set before we started.

After rehearsal I had a few hours to prepare myself for the final Jeu De Cartes show which went off fairly smoothly. Always have a good time dancing that piece in all of its insanity but yesterday my shoe decided to blow out right at the start of our movement. Nothing I can really do about that seeing the shoes didn't have any signs of being close to being done before hand but I guess I was wrong! Needless to say I was kind of stressed about that the entire time so didn't feel like I could focus on the task at hand quite as well. It was odd how much it affected me. I feel like I should be able to move on from something that miniscule without blinking but maybe the exhaustion was just setting in and I couldn't get my mind past it.

To do a really rough segway but staying on the topic of minds....I was thinking of the minds of artists today as I sat in the wings. I was watching Apollo tonight and was struck by how perfect the merging of Stravinsky's music and Balanchine's movement is. The dueling rigidity and fluidity of the muses and Apollo at times hitting such static poses and then melting into a movement right afterwards is breathtaking. I wished I could time travel back to see what it would have been like being around him creating this masterpiece. Did it all just flow out of him? Or did he toil over it for hours by himself in the studio? I am sure I could find the answer in some book about the process of creating it but it reoccured to me really how nuts so many great artists are.

Without naming names, I will say that dealing with certain people in the company at times can be a struggle. I know this has been the same way from generation to generation but why is it that the cycle of abuse and insanity cannot be stopped? Is it truly in the nature of great artists to be self obsessive or self loathing? As well as demeaning due to their insecurities? From the time I was young I was dealing with dance authority figures that fit this mold and while I am sure it is just a part of human nature in general, it seems to be especially common with artists. Some of the best dancers in the company exude a certain amount of self obsessive behavior. It can be exhausting to be around at times but when the process that comes out on stage is so beautiful can you really blame them? It seems like any biography you read of past dancers always have little seeds of insanity thrown in and I realized tonight that I am around the blossoming seeds of insanity at my job. It's both a great feeling and a bizarre one. To know that you are around the presence of greatness at one time but to also see how frustrating that behavior can be at times can be a little off-putting.

My mind at the moment is feeling insane (the to words of the blog tonight are "mind" and "insane") so I am going to watch some "Six Feet Under" a show about some more insane minds. Until later....